Omni means “of all things, in all ways, in all places. This is what God is – the All-Powerful, Always Present, Universal Absolute.
If this is so, as I believe and, dare I say, KNOW it to be, then there is not one single part of me that I will not endeavor to love.
I am choosing love, every day in every way.
…and remarkable, miraculous things are happening…
I have this longing, this yearning, for a deep, passionate, connection. Yes, with God, always. But something in me knows this will be realized in human form.
Yet, I dare say I must first give what I want because in so doing, I will know I already have.
All the ways in which I want love are showing up in ways that I am judging. No, not this one. Nope, not this one either. No thanks.
But here it is. I keep asking and receiving yet won’t accept.
This is where I know I cannot withhold from anyone that which I want. Yet, to some I do not want to give – to fore-give. And this is where death to self will happen.
“If someone slaps you on the right cheek, offer the other cheek also.”
How easily a feeling or sight caught wind of in this world can blow you down a path of dismay.
How often we accept the distress and then resist it.
Yet, there is only One power and you cannot serve two masters.
If God is Love and the omnipotent force of life, if I am out of sorts and not feeling good, who then must I be serving?
There’s no condemnation to this realization. To be aware of not feeling good is simply a loving call to return to God.
God is everywhere, in everything, at all times.
Like a sponge in a basin of water: the sponge is in the water and the water is absorbed in the sponge. I am a sponge. God is the water. At all times, I am in God and God is in me.
That is reassurance.
Be still and know that I am God.
Tend to the soil and the plant will grow itself.
Try to care for the pain within that is caused by fear and anger rather than on the situation you think is causing it. After all, it’s the pain that hurts.
Tend to the wound, not the bandage hiding it.
Every goal has a very specific vibration that resonates within my heart and it feels very good. The good feeling is what makes it a goal for me.
The goal is recovery. Recovery feels good. Being sick feels bad. Being healthy feels good. Being healthy means feeling vibrant and energetic. Being healthy means I can concentrate on doing things I love. Being healthy means knowing what I love to do. Being healthy means clarity of mind. Being healthy means I am happy and can smile. Being happy means feeling my smile and feeling its beauty. Being healthy means taking care of myself. Being healthy means knowing how to take care of myself. Being healthy means learning. Learning feels good. I like to learn. Being healthy means making meals that I enjoy. Being healthy means trying new things to find what I enjoy. It means loving what I enjoy. When I feel joy in heart I am vibrating at the same frequency of my own heart. When I feel pain, I remember that I love to learn and I learn from my pain because to learn is to be healthy. I love the feeling of health. Being healthy means feeling love in my heart for myself. Being healthy means knowing what makes my heart feel love. And when I am unsure I know I can love my unknowing because it is an opportunity to learn. And I love to learn. Being healthy means knowing I can learn. How fun would the process of learning be if I knew everything already? I love not knowing so I can learn to know. I love that the more I love the healthier I become. I love recovery because it beats the drum of wellness. I beat the drum of health in every way I can. When I succumb to an urge that doesn’t feel good I say, “I love you pain. Tell me where it hurts.” Being healthy means trusting myself and the process. Recovery is my goal and love is its beat. In everything, in every thought, I seek the beat of wellness. Being sad means my heart needs something. Maybe just a hug. Maybe it needs some food. The beat of wellness is care and compassion. And when I don’t fee care and compassion, I don’t hate myself. I send love. Even if I don’t know how to love I say, “I love you anyway.” Being healthy means trusting the seed that is within – the tiny one that planted the goal of recovery. I don’t need to make recovery happen – the goal is already achieved. Just beat the drum of what being healthy means to me. I watched TV for five straight minutes. That takes concentration. I rock! I read one page of a book that interests me. That beat feels so good! I did ten whole jumping jacks for no other reason than to feel the beating of my heart. I love that feeling of energy. See! It is in me! I was tired and so I slept the whole afternoon. I am so grateful for the rest and for honoring myself in such a magnificent way. Being healthy means rest and restoration. Today I looked myself in the eye for just one second. That was so brave! Being healthy means having courage. Look how courageous I am! Today I couldn’t look myself in the eye. I was too afraid. I felt too much shame. Being healthy means allowing myself to feel even fear and shame. That’s courageous too! Being healthy means being aware of myself. Look how aware I am, to see my own fear yet love it anyway. Fear has a powerful message that I can learn from. And I love learning. Being healthy feels so good and every time I dip a toe into the waters of self love, the waters ripple outward getting bigger and bigger as they go. It takes time to acclimatize to the feeling of a new vibration. I love that too, getting to experience the range and change of feeling. Find ways in every circumstance to find love. In perceived sickness and in perceived health, there is a wealth of truth and love and knowledge. Trust in the wisdom and experience of those who already walked a similar path. And remember, every time you fall is an opportunity to learn, to reach out your hand and to discover you are not alone. There is so much strength and collective power in a group of people who want to be well. Beat that drum! And when we all beat that same drum of wellness, the power of it is unstoppable.
Bless our courageous and loving hearts!
It was not the weekend I had expected it to be. Great emotion was released.
It came at a time when I was required to practice and send healing to someone else. I was required to give.
The deep inadequacy and unworthiness rooted in my core burst forward. Tears and anger and fear and doubt, they sprung forth from behind my hiding eyes.
I could not participate in the practice exercises for the remainder of the day and, while I wanted to leave, I remained, sitting alone in focused meditation on the presence of my Higher Awareness.
I have not experienced such internal discomfort ever.
By the end of the day, however, my anger at the person who had drawn this out of me had subsided. The dark whole had been flooded instead with gratitude for the space that had been opened.
My cleverly disguised saboteur had been identified – and she still stands close by waiting to sneak in where she sees distraction.
But I see her now. She and I, we can do this dance for as long as she needs but, in the end, the tireless presence of Love will seep into every dark spot and light the way.
I am where I am meant to be and I am not going anywhere.
I am being led in a very specific direction right now and though the obstacles are unlike any other, they are not greater than my knowing that this path I blaze now is The One.
There is a woman lying naked on the floor beneath me. She cannot see who stands above her. She trembles slightly and feels someone kneel at her feet. I can sense that she is not afraid. I am honored that she is allowing me into her vulnerability. She is gracious. I lay my hand gently over her delicateness. She is cool and soft. She shivers. She does not close. She allows me to feel her still. As my hand lays gently in place, her skin starts to warm and I can feel a gentle pulse, a warm and inviting flow. She tells me through this energy that there is trust. She knows not who I am. She is so pink and pure I dare not betray the honor of her welcome. Her body trembles again and I gently place my finger on her sweetness. Another shiver transcends across her body and her legs splay every so slightly telling me it is okay. The beauty of her womanhood is glorious. It is such a pleasure to kneel here and feel her joy at the sensation of my touch. She cannot see the person that I am but she is open to my energy and tells me through her life force to continue. My finger tip, as gently and softly as it can, circles slow atop her fragility. She is like a gentle, morning dew. Her back arches and her beauty thrusts slowly closer to me. I am in awe of this moment of grace. She is not afraid but only is loving and kind and wants to feel me more. She receives me openly and knows me only as the same beauty. What she is giving to me is more precious than what I am offering her. Yet she does not seem to be aware of a difference between us. My fingers continue circling, gently, with a care I did not know was in me. She softly moans and arches more and the energy increases. She is like a small pink rose opening her petals, opening them for me, telling me that I am pure as well. She reaches pure elation under my touch, the softness in my body I did not know was there reveals itself to me. Through her open welcome receiving she has given me more than I even knew was there.